CHAPTER VI- Desperation

"Miss Darlian, stop daydreaming!" Came a hiss. The former Queen of the World looked up almost lazily, her eyes somewhat unfocused. "Miss Darlian, I know you're stressed, but the world needs you right now. No matter how insignificant your position in politics will ever be, you are a symbol to your people, the one force that brought the colonies and Earth back together again. They need you right now!"

Relena looked up to her secretary, heart broken, but face impassive, "I will make no statement until I am certain of what to do myself. Every move in politics has to be decisive, something you will not regret in the future. I don't know which step to take right now."

The face of the secretary softened. It didn't matted how old the young woman before her was, it didn't matter how helpless she seemed; Relena Peacecraft-Darlian made everyone who listened to her feel like a child in their mother's arms. Perhaps that's why Relena had so few friends, "Miss Darlian, I think I should give this to you. It's a letter from Lady Une. She wants to hold a meeting with you and her finest Preventers to decide how her people can better protect you. I didn't think you'd want-"

Relena looked up and took the palm-sized panel into her long hands, "Ah, as usual, Une is trying to smooth things over. I guess I'll have to go."

"Very good, Miss Darlian."

"Call me Relena, please." The youth replied, and slowly rose from her chair.

The secretary bit her lip in joy. It would do her boss good to visit with her friends once more.

Heero scowled and ground his teeth as he wandered the streets aimlessly.

"Heero, do you think you could possibly come to the meeting? Relena needs some support right now and-"

"I am not the one to give it to her."

"Why not? Surely you know-" "I know what happened. I was there. I am merely her guardian, not a shoulder to cry on."

Lady Une had never, in all of the time Heero had known her, looked so flustered, "That is the most derogative comment you can say about Relena, boy! She's worked just as hard for peace as you have!"

The former terrorist narrowed his eyes, "I might drop in."

"Really? Relena will love to see you!" Une replied, smiling like a Cheshire Cat.

But of course he wasn't going. No, that was only said to reassure the distraught preventer. He just had to wait until the Act was passed, wait until the road to peace was finally smoothed over-

But what would he do once he had killed her?

He had already decided suicide would be the best way out. He could not back out of his threat, but he also knew he could not live to see the world managing peace without her there...

"Top quality! The best merchandise in the city!" A voice cried, and Heero looked up nervously. He was in a bad neighborhood, a dangerous neighborhood, and their was a drug lord selling his goods right there in the middle of the street.

And then he once again felt The Drive.

It was the need to buy, the need to consume, the need to feel the airy light-headedness that was accompanied by intaking the powdery substance. In Heero's early childhood, it had been his only peace.

They had started in small dosages, given to Heero whenever he was especially obedient or effective. With the flavor of It coursing through his veins, there had been no need for fear, no need for guilt. Then, he was allowed to consume regularly, making addiction set in permanently.

But it hadn't stopped there.

They decreased his amounts, only let him have It when he did especially well, binding him to them by The Drive.

And Heero stopped involuntarily, hands shaking nervously at the sight of the pure peace before him, the way to make all pain go away...His only form of peace-

"Hey, bro." The pale man asked wryly, shaking the small packets of powder, "Yah want da merchandise? Yah gotta pay. Show me yer money."

The dealer was shaking the packets just like the nurse did right before she poured it onto his food. Heero trembled, his reason leaving quickly. It was his only peace-

NO! Wait! Relena had replaced the drugs. Relena was peace everlasting. The drugs...the drugs could only make peace temporary. Relena, Relena would make it last forever...

Heero regained control of his rebellious body, "No, I'm not buying."

"Then get out of here!" The man shouted, and Heero stumbled away.

So maybe it wouldn't hurt to see her. Just for a little while. Just to reassure himself of the peace he needed so desperately. Like a drug, he would only allow himself small amounts...just enough to keep him sane.

The room was pretty small, stripped down to bare necessities. The chairs were just barely comfortable enough to be endurable, and the screen behind them was flawless white. A woman stood in front of that screen, cold eyes scanning the room. Her name was Lady Une. Beautiful dark hair was swept off of her shoulders, and a lovely figure was outline by the whiteness of the screen behind her. Some would even venture to say she was beautiful, except for the harsh expression that marred her beautiful countenance.

The first arrival was a boy named Duo Maxwell, box of donuts in one hand and girlfriend in the other. Lady Une was most displeased, and pretended to ignore him. She would also have ignored Wufei Chang and his wife, Sally Po, but they were arguing far too loudly to be disregarded. The quiet ones, a blond boy named Quatre and a lion-tamer named Trowa had settled into a corner, not really paying attention to anything.

Lady Une tapped her foot. Her most important guest was already twenty minutes late.

The door opened, but it was not the much-anticipated Relena Darlian, as everyone had expected, but a lean, cruel figure, known as Heero Yuy.

Everyone was silent instantly.

"Heero?! How dragged you out of your shell?" Duo shouted enthusiastically, spraying bits of donut all over the tabletop.

"Lady Une knows me far too well," was his only reply as he settled himself into a corner.

Everyone turned to stare at Lady Une, even Sally and Wufei.

She shrugged, smiling slightly, "With no windows, security cameras, or guards to impersonate, he had no option but to show himself."

Trowa leaned back slightly, "So you mean that there is no record whatsoever that this meeting existed?"

"Spare your invitations, no. I called you here to discuss the security issues surrounding Miss Relena Darlian-Peacecraft. As you may have noticed, it is quite dangerous for her to be in the public right now. And-"

"-You are here to take whatever precautions necessary to ensure my safety." A voice finished for Lady Une, and Relena appeared in the doorframe, leaning slightly against one side.

Heero perked up. She obviously did not look well. Her shining hair was tied harshly away from her face, and her posture was slightly different than normal. Yet she was smiling, exuding warmth for everyone who needed it. Heero scowled. She was always like that, willing enough to forgo her own happiness to restore others. The old Relena from before, from the time of the wars, would have been crying. Perhaps, in a way, Relena had become just as emotionless as he was before.

"Relena," Hilde half stood up, but Duo had placed a hand on her shoulder solemnly. Relena smiled at her friend and settled herself in the chair beside Lady Une's vacant one. Heero looked up at her from the set on the other side of the empty one, eyes cold. Relena put a hand on her cheek and pushed around the papers in front of her. She seemed distant...withdrawn-

Utterly helpless.

Lady Une snapped her hand on with a short stick, pacing upon the space in front of the wide table, eyes narrowed, "Well, folks. I think we all know what's going on here."

"Yeah, Heero's girlfriend is being stalked by a weird psycho dude, " Duo supplied, "I think we all figured that one out real fast."

Heero targeted Duo with a glare. Relena paid no attention, lost in her own little world.

"Thank you for the very...um...shortened version," Une replied, smiling slightly, "We don't have very much information, but let's recap, okay?" Une took her three steps forward, paused and took her three steps back. The room was completely silent, "Three men, presumable assassins broke into Miss Darlian's house three days ago, killed her butler and guard detail, threatened her life, and left. Then she received a very offensive and perverse message the following yesterday at Yuy Memorial Hospital on-"

"I don't need any reminders, okay?!" Relena suddenly shouted, leaping up furiously and slamming her hands on the table. She was shaking with anger, eyes hot and glittering with unshed tears, "What the heck is this anyway? I have no involvement in enforcing measures! Why am I here?"

Lady Une kept her cool, eyes narrowed, "Because of your refusal to make a public statement and your patchy report to the police. None of us here," her expansive gesture included the whole room, "know exactly what happened. You could give us valuable information, help us to take a step in the right direction-"

Relena paled, her body tense, "Ask Heero if you have any questions, I told him everything I know. Now, I have more important things to do."

She pushed aside her chair and strode proudly to the door.

"Relena," Une called. She paused at the doorway, "Relena, what will you do?"

"Well, talking seems to be the only thing I'm good at," she said bitterly, looking pointedly at Heero, "so I guess I'd better go do some public speaking."

The door slammed after her.

Duo shivered melodramatically, looking from Heero to the door and back again, "Woah! Looks like they're at a low point in their relationship!"

Heero ignored his friend and pretended not to pay attention to anything.

Duo sighed, "Look, Heero, of all of us here, you're the one closest to Relena," At Heero's dangerous glare Duo raised his arms in surrender, "I'm not saying romantically -even if you two make a cute couple- I'm just saying you know her better. It's your obligation to comfort her! She's had a rough time. You know what it's like to have someone threaten your life for no real reason, her brother did that to you daily. The rest of us don't have a lot of experience in that department. Most everyone after our heads had a legitimate cause, right, Hildie?" Duo turned to his girlfriend with a sweet look on his face but she merely socked him in the arm.

Heero jumped up from the table, grabbed his jacket and stalked out.

Duo put a head on his hand and sighed romantically.

Hilde punched him again.

She was on the roof. She had run from him for a while, blindly follow the stairs upward, animal instinct overtaking reasoning. And he had caught up to her.

Obviously.

"Leave me alone, Heero," Relena hissed, facing the cityscape that stretched out below her. The city reached all horizon lines, replacing nature with geometric perfection.

"No. You're not in your right mind."

"I need time to sort it all out in my head, that's all. I need time-" She was backing away from him instinctively, unaware that she was approaching the edge "-to figure out what I'm going to do next-"

He darted forward and pulled her away from her death, holding her tightly in a rough embrace.

And then he lost it.

She was so beautiful. Her perfect face was marred by a slight frown of confusion, her soft eyes melting any resolve left in his body. Her lips-he couldn't help himself. He kissed her.

And then he drowned.

Drowned in her scent, her taste, her touch. Nerves exploded throughout his body in the sheer release a kiss can provide. A release he was unaware of, for he had never kissed anyone before.

And to his shock, she was kissing him back, vigorously. She wrapped her arms around him, then let her hands travel up into his hair, where she ran long fingers through his locks, pressing her body against his desperately. It was...phenomenal.

And then she pushed him away, in fear and nervousness, drawing deep breaths, "Heero, I-"

"Relena, I need-" He extended his hands. He needed her so badly. Now that he had her, he could not live without her. In that one brief moment, they had leaped the boundary between semi-friends into romantic interests. It was too incredible for either of them to believe.

He stepped towards her again, carefully, as if trying to tame a wild animal. Slowly, he drew her back into his arms and rested her head against his chest.

She spoke, voice muffled in his shirt, but clear enough to understand, "Heero, I could just be using you. I might be trying to escape grief in your arms." She pulled up her head to look into his eyes, "I might not love you."

He tightened his arms around her possessively, "I don't care. I don't care."