Once upon an Afternoon... By Sabersonic

Legal Notes: I do not own Gundam Wing, Pokemon, Escaflowne or its characters, but it would have been fun though.

Author's notes: Sentences surrounded by (these) are author notes, character quotes surrounded by 'these' are thoughts and character quotes surrounded by "these" means that the character is talking(duh!).

On a quiet Summer Afternoon, a van is parked on the side of the street and inside the van, eleven cramped people were listening to the surveillance equipment recently embedded in the house on the other side of the street. Within the house that was being listen to by eleven cramped people in a van across the street was a pair of two people, one a young woman and the other a young man, were going about their business of going about their lives, not knowing about the van parked across the street that was being listen to by eleven cramped people(Annoying huh?). Both were in the kitchen of the house and going about their business like normal folk. The young girl was working on a lab top on the kitchen table and the young man was washing the dishes.

"What are you working on now 'Lena?" The young man asked the young lady whom he called Lena.

"Oh, nothing much Max, just something that needs to be typed." Lena answered the one whom she called Max.

"So, this surrey has lasted this long huh Lena?" Max wondered out loud.

"What do you mean Max?" The puzzled Lena asked.

"I mean it's been five entire months since you left behind your life as Relena Peacecraft, or Darlin, or what ever your last name was and they haven't found us since. Sorta makes you thing huh?"

"Well, I just had to get myself out of that mess that was my life. With all of the political meetings, kidnappers and assassins, it's enough to make anyone crazy."

"Are you sure you're not now?"

"What's that suppose to mean?" Max then cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled in a poor woman's voice.

"HEERO! COME BACK TO ME HEERO! PEASE KILL ME HEERO! Man, you're a regular stalker that time and it surprises me that he didn't kill yah then." Inside the van, a listener with a meter long braid started to laugh at Max's joke and then received a fist in his face by two other listeners.

"Well, at least I'm not a paid spy like you are."

"Informant, informant. People pay me for information." Max, the informant continues to wash the dishes. "And besides, some people might have thought that you have a crush on the poor guy or something."

"He just interest's me, that's all Max."

"And is that the reason you made five websites and a webring in honor of Heero Yuy....Relena P (That's a screen name for those who don't know squat about the internet.)." Max teased.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about?" Relena was in a state of shock of what Max had said.

"Don't play innocent with me, I saw the websites and you keep on saying that you're Heero's girl and all and trying to hide your identity by saying that 'Relena didn't deserve him.'"

"What make's you think that I was the one who did all of that you've said?"

"You left your laptop on when you went to the bathroom a few weeks ago, which sort of reminds me of something...." Max removes the rubber gloves, pulls out a hand held tape recorder from his pocket and pressed play. "I sort a picked this up a few days before."

*Grunt* *Purr* *Yell* *Shrieks* *Breath's deeply* *Grunt*

"And what implies you to think that those are my-" Relena was interrupted by her own recorded voice on the tape moaning someone's name.

"Ohhh, Heeerrroooo....."

"Ack, give that back!" Relena dashed for the tape recorder in Max's hand, but he moves it beyond her reach.

"I also picked up some noises from the past several weeks and you were yodeling up to high heaven each and every time, I guess that was the reason you were reluctant to get out of the bathroom this morning. Man, the look on ol' Zechys face when he hears this is going to be priceless." In the van, a camera in the hands of the Braided Listener captured the face of a man with long platinum hair. The man with platinum hair hand slapped the braided man extremely hard and almost knocked him to the ground.

"You wouldn't!" Relena growled.

"I would if the price is right. But then again, it would be a bad idea."

"Oh, and why's that?"

"'Cuz I might get shot by that Heero of yours since he might think that I've kidnapped yah."

"Heero wouldn't do that?"

"The old Perfect Soldier wouldn't, but the lovesick Heero would. The Perfect Soldier wouldn't do such a rash decision, but since he meet yah, he would."

"What?"

"As far as I know, Dr. J trained him to have no emotions at all, to suppress them. Then he meet you and then all hell breaks lose in that brain of his. Confusing him to the core and would have brought him to the brink of madness since he'd never felt such emotions before. The only person who doesn't know that he's in love with yah is ol' Heero himself. If he hadn't meet you, he would have killed Millardo or he would have joined White Fang, so then again, him having emotions would be a good thing."

"Heero loves me?" Inside the van, the braided listener slaps the back of a Prussian eyed listener as if congratulating him and the Prussian eyed listener back-fisted the braided listener and fell to the floor.

"Well, that's what I've concluded anyway." Max finishes the last of the dishes and puts them away.

"Thanks for doing the dishes for me."

"What are you talking about-" Then a realization hits Max. "Wait a minute, today was your day to- WHY YOU BACKSTABBING LITTLE TRAITOR!!!!!" His face was red with furry. "Your just like Midii, using your stinking angel-like innocents to manipulate and trick people!"

"You know Middi Une?"

"Yes, she's a distant bloody cousin of mine for crying out loud. When she was ten years old, she came to my parent's house and started crying like a baby saying rubbish like the only guy she had only felt for hates him and stuff like that. Eight years later, I found the guy that she was blubbering about. Goes by the name of Trowa Barton and so I gave her his current address and never called back since. Makes me think that he killed her out of hatred or something."

"She's married."

"Say what?"

"The last that I've heard of them is that they were going to be married two months ago."

"Well, aren't I the little mach maker." Max rubs his hand on the back of his head.

"Is she also related to Lady Une?"

"Course, our family is huge and there isn't a single country on earth that didn't have at least one member of the Une clan."

"Is there a relation in the colonies?"

"Only one, my forty-eight cousin's brother's son who goes by the name of Duo Maxwell."

"Duo's an Une?" The occupants of the van were just as surprised and both the Braided listener and the once-split personality listener looked at each other with shocked eyes.

"Yep, probably doesn't know himself either, being a war orphan and all. Like I said, we have a big family. Some poor, some rich, and some are just smack in the middle of it all." Max walks to the freezer and pulls out a carton containing a pizza. "And we probably don't know that the other existed since we are also spread out thinly. Yah remember Charles Manson?"

"I think so."

"He's related to us by marriage to his wife who was related again by marriage from her father who's name was legally changed from a feuded. I guess that the Une has a long history of mental disorder, skips a generation or two but still." Many jaw droppings in the van from this information. The braided listener made a joke about the once-spit personality listener and received a slap from the once-split personality listener.

"Who are you working for information again?" Relena asked Max Une.

"What sort a question is that?" Max Une places his hand on his hip.

"It just popped into my head and you never mentioned about any of your clients."

"Well there were several producers from Sunrise, yah know the guys who made 'Vision of Esca Flone', who wanted to create a series about the Gundam pilots during the Eve Wars and a movie of the Mariemeia Incident and wanted me to get all the information I can get on the guys and everyone else involved in the wars."

"What's it called Max?"

"Mobile Suit Gundam Wing or something like that." The door bell rang and Max Une started for the door. "I'll get it." Relena follows Max out of curiosity and what she found was shocking to her. Treiz Kushrenada was wearing a UPS uniform(AAAAAA!!!! Treiz in shorts, AAAAAA!!!!!!) and was holding a brown box and a clip board.

"Geez, took them long enough."

"I'm sorry sir, the delivery was delayed after that terrorist attack at the airport." Treiz Kushrenada said as Max Une sighed the signature form.

"Right Bob, I'll see yah next month." As Max closed the door, Relena was looking at him with questionable eyes. "He had amnesia during the battle with White Fang. Doesn't even know that he's the former leader of OZ and the World Nation. Man, that guy is sure to be surprised when he sees Gundam Wing come on the tube." Massive shocking of all listeners of a vision about Treize Kushrenada in shorts.

"Do you really thing that they will base the series just on the information you've gathered."

"Nah, don't think so. The producers would probably interview the pilots about the information they got from me. Duo would probably volunteer to be an actor of himself, knowing him." The Braided listener tries to get out of the van, but the other occupants held him back.

"What's in the package Max?"

"Software of the Month Club. I'm hopping that it's that new hacker's program that I've been waiting for."

"So you can get classified information for your clients?"

"Hey, my business is info and I want them to get the best I can get. It was no problem when I found the schematics and blue prints of Gundam Wing Zero and built it."

"What?!" The Prussian Eyed listener, the Platinum Blond Listener, an Arabian listener and a long bangs listener were shocked to find a third mobile suit equip with the ZERO system. All occupants promptly came out of the van and walked towards the house.

"Yah, have it right under this very house and mastered the ZERO System. Now I'm the third person to have mastered the ZERO system. Went nuts at first, but I gotten around it."

"Is that why you got all the Pokemon Merchandise in the attic?" Relena teased.

"Sadly, yes. Besides, I was insane at the time." Then the doorbell rang. "I'll get it." Max walked toward the front door, opened it and slammed it closed again. "Relena, it's for you." Max called. Relena reluctantly walked toward the front door and opened it to find the occupants of the Van across the street at the front porch.

"Relena, can we talk?" Milliardo Peacecraft asked his little sister.

"H-how did you find me?"

"We thought you were kidnapped and we were looking at you-" Quatre was interrupted by Duo Maxwell/Une with his face covered in bruises.

"Hey Max, where's the office of Sunrise? I need to speak with them about Gundam Wing."

"Hey, how did you know about that and how did you know my name?" Max asked the Braided Gundam pilot.

"We had surveillance devices all over the house and we sort a heard every thing that you two were talking about." Relena blushed when she heard this and Max Une was laughing at her.

"Man, I hate to be in her shoes now. Hehehehe."

~Fin~

How'd you like it? Send E-mail at Sabersonic@Hotmail.com